1. DVR - dude, where did I live without DVR? seriously? It's sad that I'm so dependent on it, but honestly...like when "The Cosby Show" (yes, second Cosby reference, but for real) was on the other night in that airtime between "Gossip Girl" and "The Hills," guess what episode it was? You guessed right, it was the episode where Heathcliff buys this ridiculous appliance, and Clare Huxtable is like, you know, Cliff, you never use these things, but Theo and Cliff are like, oh Clare, stop being such a woman.
And then Cliff leaves the appliance plugged in like a doofus in the kitchen. And everyone has to go out, so Denise has to watch Rudy and her chubby tracksuit-wearing friend Peter, who is hysterical-looking. Backstory on Peter is he likes to play in clotheshampers. We know this because Cliff warns Rudy and Peter, "no playing in the clotheshampers, you hear?" and Peter, with his bowl cut not unlike Matt Wallace circa 2002, nods ably.
So obviously, Denise has to take a call and leaves Rudy on her own with Peter. At this point, my roommate and Cosby aficionado G called out, "OMG! You have to DVR this because we have to have it forever!" (she'd been referencing this very episode earlier). I did as I was told, not knowing how to program anything on DVR.
I did it right. And now, for all eternity, I have, captured on a magical TV box, the scene where Rudy and Peter decide to make peanut butter and jelly in the blender. Peter notably drops the bread on the ground first and meticulously wipes each piece on his sleeve to the sound of audience laughter. I was DYING. Then, they put all the grapes in the appliance, get sprayed, and Peter BOOKS IT for the door. Cut directly to scene of every Huxtable family member walking into the kitchen and finding the mess, and Cliff getting a phone call from Peter's dad, saying he found Peter in the clotheshamper.
Who wouldn't be glad they had that shit on DVR?
2. Wouldn't it be awesome - I mean, AWESOME - if you could make soundtracks for your life? Like if we were all movie characters? I know what my soundtrack would include. I don't really have much to say, but I guess I wish it were possible. I hear all kinds of shit in my head anyway, it'd be better if other people heard the same stuff. I'd probably make more sense.
TRACKS TO DOWNLOAD:
1. "liquidity sharks" - Dollaz$ and Carlson
2. "the good life" - weezer
3. "dreadlock holiday" - 10cc
4. "honor and harmony" - g love
5. "let the beat build" - lil wayne
6. "our lawyer made us change the name..." - fall out boy
7. "valerie" - the zutons and "valerie" - steve winwood
8. "gimme some lovin'" - spencer davis group
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